Los Angeles Loyolan Review

 

by Catherine Cunningham

Imagine that neither you nor your partner can reproduce. The process of finding a suitable surrogate mother and sperm donor through paperwork seems hectic and frustrating. Still, you go through it and think you've found the right people.

Now imagine that your chosen surrogate mother's resume is a complete lie. She has only one kidney and multiple health issues. Now, she's carrying your child.

This is the scenario that Nicole Conn presents at the start of her documentary, "Little Man" -- an intense, brutally honest documentary which follows Conn and her partner Gwen as they experience what no parent ever wants to even think of going through. The rest of the documentary follows her on a journey of obsession, love and pain. Her son Nicholas is born 100 days early, weighing in at only 1 pound; it's as though a fetus is lying right before your eyes.

The disclaimer at the beginning, "Warning: graphic medical material" does not prepare you for the stomach-churning footage of Nicholas. Dubbed "Little Man" by Nicole and Gwen, Nicholas is a tiny ball of hope. Throughout the film, he beats the odds repeatedly, almost knocking down the statistics of his survival with his little fist.

You cannot help but become attached to Nicholas as you watch him grow to 2 pounds and finally 3. Oddly, he looks almost chubby, but then you realize that he is hardly the size of your two hands. The startling camera angles and the close shots of him burn his image into your mind.

Nicholas is not the only child who remains in your mind long after the film is over. Gabrielle, Nicole and Gwen's first child, grabs your heart from the minute she is born.

Her life is also documented before her brother's birth, and the viewer watches as she grows into a beautiful young girl. While Nicole -- whom Gabrielle calls "Mommy Coco" -- becomes obsessed with Nicholas' survival, you see Gabrielle gradually become more neglected. Not only does Gabrielle lose one of her mothers, but Gwen also loses her lover.

Gabrielle's laugh is the best part of the film, and her aura, in general, is more than just comic relief. Her innocence brings the true essence of human beings to light, and her ability to remain happy throughout the trials and tribulations presented by Nicholas' existence is almost unbelievable.

Nicole doesn't pretend she's the perfect parent either. The thing about this documentary is that everyone is honest the entire way through. Gwen is upfront about not wanting to attempt to save Nicholas. When Nicole insists on saving his life, Gwen is also extremely truthful about hating what Nicholas' life does to their relationship and to their family.

The film will make you think. You will find yourself sitting on the edge of your seat, with your hand over your mouth, hoping that Nicholas doesn't die. You will want to cry, but at times, you will laugh. Not only does Gabrielle provide serious comic relief, but so do the nurses and doctors.

They tell Nicole, straight to her face, that she is annoying, intense and dominating. They make sure she knows that she is crazy, and that her obsession with Nicholas' life is unhealthy. But, on the same level, they understand.

The reality of this film is startling. Nicole said that she had to make it to let people know what it's really like to go through something like this. While watching, it is difficult to side with Nicole or Gwen. On the one hand, Nicholas' chances of survival are slim to none-on the other hand, he is absolutely adorable.

Sometimes, however, the movie is just too intense. It's almost too much to handle at once. Anxiety-ridden, you just want to know if the "Little Man," to whom you're becoming more attached to by the minute, will live or die. In this sense, the film accomplishes just what Nicole wanted it to-awareness by experiencing it through someone else. At times it drags on, though, and you find yourself wondering when it's going to be over, so you can finally learn the outcome.

For a documentary, the film is done very well. It is personal enough for you to feel as though you are with Nicole and Gwen every step of the way. You can still detach yourself enough to know that you aren't really there, and it's not happening to you.

If you like documentaries that frighten and amaze you at the same time, this one is for you.

Grade: B